


To Feel Your Touch On Me

by SuhailaUniverse



Category: Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: Angst, F/M, Ficlet, Headcanon, Markings, One-off, ring loss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-31
Updated: 2018-03-31
Packaged: 2019-04-16 05:58:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14158296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuhailaUniverse/pseuds/SuhailaUniverse
Summary: Headcanon: After seeing the early fan pics strongly indicating Claire loses Jamie’s ring instead of Frank’s in s4, plus tonight’s (20/3/18) hint from Leanne Aguilera’s video about the hand carvings *maybe* being done later on in the show (perhaps s4 itself) too, had me immediately think what if Jamie marks her, so she doesn’t feel like he’s ever not with her and vice versa. I'mma hope, and put money down on it lol (set in s4 show!Verse).





	To Feel Your Touch On Me

The night was bitterly cold, or was it the shock from the evening’s earlier events, Claire couldn’t tell. It had all happened so quickly. Bonnet’s men rushed the boat leaving them no time to think, only act on instinct. And when Bonnet made to grab her rings… She could think of nothing else but keeping them safe. So she’d tried to swallow them before the blow landed squarely in her gut and a sound that she was likely never to forget - the ping of metal against wood - as one of her bands was knocked clean out of her mouth and landed by Bonnet’s feet and the gleam of silver in moonlight shone between his fingers as he’d pick it up.

Her scream had pierced the night air. And the lump in her throat nothing whatsoever to do with what she knew was her gold band lodged there.

He’d taken it purely out of spite. Seeing her feral reaction to him holding it with such indifference to its significance. To what it truly meant. A sum far greater than any riches he’d ever find.

Now, she sat by the fire of their makeshift campsite, the waning moon sapping her energy as she held up her pale and obscenely naked right hand to the light. Her eyes and throat raw. She hadn’t been able to speak for the tears wouldn’t abate.

Jamie had been gentle with her. Hadn’t lost his temper at her stupid, mindless anger.  _Bravery_ he’d called it. But if she’d kept her head, if she’d just not reacted so strongly, maybe the bastard Bonnet would have tossed the ring aside, worthless as it was to  _him_.

 _Jamie_.

The thought of him sent a jolt through her (as it had every time since the incident) that immediately had her searching for him - he stood half watching her as he rubbed down the horses just behind her. She couldn’t help but let the fear creep into her marrow. The thought of losing him again. It had never really left her ever since she found him again. She’d been able to push it aside and find herself in him again, but the lightness of her right ring finger proved how fleeting it could all be. She hadn’t taken off his ring in over twenty years, ever since he’d put it on her, yet now, in the blink of an eye, it was gone. What if…

A sob ran through her so violently that sent Jamie immediately to her side.

“What is it, Sassenach? I canna bear seeing ye so. Tell me what it is I can do to ease ye, please.” He asked, pleading. She knew he’d felt helpless and he’d sent the others ahead to Riverrun, so as to give her time to process what had happened in private.

“I’m sorry,” she hoarsely whispered for what felt like the hundredth time. “I just… Seeing my hand bare. It feels wrong and like a part of you has been sliced away from me. A part of you that was always comfort and home. It wasn’t just a ring, Jamie, it was your touch on me forever. I can’t bear the thought of its loss. And how… How easily it is to have something so powerful ripped away from me. I can’t have  _you_ ripped away from ever again!”

“You willna lose me, mo chridhe,” he said, shifting his weight so he could cradle her against his chest. To feel him so, alive and around her, his arms tight as vices, the heat pulsing through him and into her, she never wanted to lose that feeling ever again. “Twenty years I’ve been wi’ ye. I ken what that ring meant, to you, to me. But I’m always with ye, Claire.” He could feel her rising panic, her agitation every time he was away from her. She wouldn’t sleep that night, he knew, for fear he’d be gone when she woke. And knew mere words would not be enough to calm her tumult.

An everlasting touch that no man could take away… He grabbed her hand, kissing her palm long and hard; a tear running down his nose gently plunked on her finger.

“Give me your hand, Sassenach, and let me give you a touch no one living can ever take away from ye. A ring you can lose, a touch’s forever,“ he said, his voice heavy with emotion.

Catching his meaning, she pulled out the tiny sgian dhu he’d given her the day before. “Deep enough to leave a scar,” was all she said.

“Claire—” he began, a hint of uncertainty creeping in.

“I don’t care if it hurts, it can’t hurt more than what I feel now.”

He looked at her for a brief moment, sadness flickering through his eyes, but turned her right palm up, examining it carefully. Then, without taking his eyes from hers, brought it to his mouth and sucked hard, numbing it. Taking the sgian dhu from her, he swiftly sliced a slightly crooked  _J_ into the base of her thumb. Blood welled up immediately but she didn’t feel a thing as he quickly brought it back to his mouth till the blood flow slowed.

Taking a handkerchief from his pocket, he poured a drop of whisky from his flask onto the cut before neatly binding her hand. Then, silently, handed the wee dagger to her, holding his palm up, and waited. She could see his desire was just as strong as her own.

She kissed his palm tenderly, then with a surgeon’s certainty, sliced a neat  _C_  into the base of his left thumb. His breath hissed between his teeth for a moment.

She quickly unwrapped her hand and brought it flush with his, her forehead coming to rest against his, closed her eyes and breathed for what felt like first time since Bonnet.

“Blood of my Blood…” she whispered.  
  
“…and Bone of my Bone,” he answered softly. The rest of the vow hung unspoken, achingly between them. She felt him smile.  
  
“Longer than that,” he said firmly, and pulled her to him once more.

***


End file.
